Shedding Light: Santiago Pedestrian Signals

Political correctness has gone completely mad in Santiago. It seems they are now catering for everyone with any condition. Once upon a time just slapping on a half arsed ramp for a dude in wheel chair was good enough, or shove some bumpy dot things on a public phone and then walk away. Now it seems tax payers money is thrown at every type of disorder under the sun. Here are just a few of the plethora of crossing lights I saw. As far as I can gather this green pedestrian light (above) is saying; Please Cross: If You Have Diarrhea (Licorice Arse, The Gravox Train, A Malfunctioning Jedi Dark Saber), or even; Please Cross: Unkempt Circus Women.


Not sure what kind of neighbourhood this is but I think it is indicating the following; Please Cross: If You Have Extreme It's-Already-Reached-The-Ground Diarrhea (The Derailed Express Gravox Train, A Bad Case Of The Cheeky Cough, Log-Cabin Fever, A Curious Case Of Benjamin's Butt-hole), which I imagine would be more of a frantic, screaming run than a walk. Or possibly this; Please Cross: If You Need To Shit Like A Demon Possessed By Another Demon That Has The Gravox Train.


This one has me somewhat confused but no doubt it is saying something along the lines of; Please Cross: If Your Abdomen Is On Fire, or maybe; Please Cross: If You Have Stage II Symptoms Of The Flesh Eating Virus, or perhaps even; Please Cross: If You Have An Uneaten Family Sized Margarita Pizza Wrapped Around Your Torso. Needless to say, I was mightily confused about where I was to cross, so most of the time I just made a mad dash with the Unkempt Circus Women.