Just Another New Smurf In Town

Gargamel? Tell that wanker he can kiss my big blue @$%!


Me and Smurfette down at the pub for a local Darts night. We won of course, a wicked meat hamper and discount coupons for half priced drinks at the bar.


Me, Papa Smurf and Brainy Smurf met up with the Bundaberg Bear (can't remember his name anymore!), he was looking pretty sloshed at this stage of the day (11am in fact, before Okberfest even started! ). Papa got in a fight, lost, then had his beard set on fire. Brainy dropped and broke his glasses in the urinal and Bundy went rabid in the jumpy castle attacking the children — the RSPC came, tranquilised him and took him away. What a day!


Promo shot for our new album Shady Fatal Smurf Smirk. That's Teflon Rough Smurf a.k.a. Vigilante Sharp and me in the background (Baller Trouble Smurf Swoop a.k.a. Mista Sheets). Look out for hot new tracks like Gunshot Smurfshot, I Wanna Get Smurfed, How I Could Just Kill A Smurf, What Go Around Come Around Smurf, Don't Smurf On Me Punk, Fuck Papa Smurf, What You Smurfing At Bitch?


Blue Light Disco Daze. Mental party every Wednesday night in Smurf Village, usually lasts for 3 or 4 days and everyone gets pretty loose. We have it in an underground warehouse these days because 2 years ago Gargamel's cat Azrael breached the frontline defenses and killed and ate 24 Smurfs. A dark day for Smurfs indeed. Retribution was swift and merciless, Papa Smurf and the Marine Smurfs went into Gargamel's castle and burned it to the ground. Garga's was away at a day spa but Azrael fucking GOT it!